Las Vegas Gazette – March 30, 2025
A Night of Bluffs, Bets, and Bragging Rights
By Johnny “Jackpot” Henderson
LAS VEGAS – In a city where poker dreams are made and shattered in a single hand, the backroom of The St. Olaf Temple Casino played host to one of the most electrifying underground poker showdowns in recent memory. A night of sharp strategy, brazen bluffs, and high-stakes rivalries unfolded as nine seasoned players clashed for the ultimate title – the G.O.A.T Award.
The Players and Their Feuds
The lineup was nothing short of legendary. Josh “The Human Disco Ball” McLean, known for his flashy attire and even flashier plays, found himself at odds with Paul “Beetlejuice” Carney, whose erratic style kept opponents guessing. Meanwhile, Andy “The Scouse Colombian Drug Dealer” Phipps played it cool despite a long-standing rivalry with Gordon “Crazy Frog” Daylate, who, true to his nickname, seemed to leap into hands that made no sense—until they did.
Jake “Snake Eyes” Haynes and Glyn “The Apprentice” Jones found themselves in a battle of wits, with Jones desperately trying to prove he was more than just an up-and-comer. Phil “The New Boy” McLean, a fresh face in the scene, found himself tested against seasoned veterans, with many eager to see if he would sink or swim. But it was Alastair “The Bluffalo” McPherson who nearly stole the show, making bold moves that left even the most seasoned players questioning reality.
Then there was Andy “The Hustler” Crawley. With a name like that, expectations were high—and he did not disappoint.
The Game: All-In for Glory
The chips flew fast and furiously as the game intensified. McLean started strong, using his usual showmanship to mask an impressive series of early wins. But Carney, always unpredictable, made sure the disco ball didn’t shine too brightly for long. Phipps played methodically, carefully calculating each move, while Daylate’s reckless approach had the table in stitches—and sometimes in fear.
Phil McLean, the newcomer, held his own against the experienced crowd, proving he wasn’t just there for a lesson. As the night progressed, it became clear that Crawley was in his element. With an uncanny ability to read his opponents, he dismantled McPherson’s aggressive bluffs and outmaneuvered Phipps in several key hands. Snake Eyes Haynes nearly made a miraculous comeback, only to be shut down by Crawley’s killer instinct.
In the final showdown, Crawley faced off against Phipps and McPherson. The tension was thick as the final cards hit the table. Crawley, ever the hustler, played his hand to perfection, leaving his opponents with no choice but to concede.
The Champion and the Legacy
With a winning smirk, Andy “The Hustler” Crawley claimed the coveted G.O.A.T Award, cementing his status as the king of the St. Olaf Temple backroom. Phipps and McPherson, the valiant runners-up, walked away with their pride intact—and a burning desire for a rematch.
Beyond the game itself, the night was a roaring success. Laughter, camaraderie, and a healthy dose of friendly rivalry filled the air, with the players raising £100 for Lodge funds—a noble effort, even amidst the bluffs and bad beats.
As the night came to a close, one thing was certain—this was no ordinary poker game. It was a battle of minds, a spectacle of skill, and, for one lucky Hustler, a night of pure triumph.
Until next time, gentlemen—shuffle up and deal!
